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Ciclone and Hand Grenades


Written by Kid Bacardi

          Now that the summer is half over, there are bound to be a shit ton of crazy stories floating around. I want to know what all the other drunks have been up to. Send me your stories, and the craziest one will get a free College Drunk Fest shirt. Speaking of fucked up shit, we found bottles of Absinthe for only forty dollars. Click here and order your bottle of fun today. Finally, if you want to check out some smokin’ pictures, check these out.
The Filling Station” border=0 align=left></a>
          We woke up Saturday morning and chilled at Ryan’s dorm for a while. The dude whose pizza we ate the night before asked us if we ate it. <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>Of course we denied it</font></a>, but he knew that it was us. We decided to go get some breakfast and went down the road to “The Pancake House”. This place was fucking horrible. It was a jancky ass place that was worse than cooking for ourselves. <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>They even fucked up the water</font></a>. After choking down our meals, we decided to go to the “beach”. The beach ended up being the <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>most white trash place ever</font></a>. It was about 10 feet wide and made of gravel. We chilled there for a while and started talking to some old dude from Texas. He was trying to find something to smoke out of because he had some “killer hash”. This soon got old as fuck and we headed back to Ryan’s dorm. He had to work at 3 so we decided to find somewhere to booze. We found out that everyone riding in the car but the driver could drink. Simon decided that he would DD and we went to get some booze. We decided that <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>we needed to hunt down some Everclear</font></a> so we could make hand grenades. We stopped at Wal-Mart but that was a bust, plus the only Budweiser that they had cold were 12 packs for 9 bones. We said fuck it and rolled out to find a liquor store. After driving a few more blocks, we saw a sign for “Wine and Spirits”. We pulled in to check it out, but it turned out to be mostly wine, with <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>a real shitty selection of booze</font></a>. The old bitches that worked there didn’t even know what Everclear was. A few more block and we hit the jack pot. We rolled into a liquor store and they had Everclear. We picked up a bottle of that, a bottle of Ciclone, and some Bud. <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>We mixed our drinks in the parking lot</font></a> and headed back toward a Ryan’s dorm. On the way back, we decided to crash a pool. There was a spot a little up the road form the dorm, so we decided to hit it up. We started getting loaded in the pool and then a bunch of kids showed up and started splashing around. We finished the first bottle of Ciclone in no time and sent Simon back to the store to pick up another. I started doing back flips into the pool and <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>James tried but just landed on his back</font></a>. We found some little kid to show up James. This kid was busting out flips left and right, making James look dumb as fuck. James was wasted now, so he kept trying to bust a flip but continued to fuck up. Soon we were all tanked and both bottles were gone. We rolled back over to Ryan’s and passed out for a while. We all got up and showered to get ready to go out. We headed to a bar called the Filling Station first and it was kinda gay. We were all still tanked so we just chilled at a table and had a few drinks. Some bitch that Adam was with did karaoke and then came to ask us how it was. She did some country bullshit so <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>I told her how much I fuckin hated her choice of song</font></a>. She was one of those bitches that has had her ego stroked her whole life, so I put her on blast. She started talking shit back, but you know how well that usually goes. In no time she was the <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>biggest member of the Kyle Fan Club</font></a> and left the bar. That place soon got gay as fuck, so we headed to some townie bar that they always hang out at called Sharky’s. There weren’t that many people there, but the drinks were cheap. <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>Ryan got a tray of tequila shots</font></a> so we started putting them back. We played pool for most of the night and then started talking to some of the girls that Ryan worked with. Somebody called Ryan from the dorms and told him that the kids whose pizza we ate called security on us so we couldn’t stay there that night. The girls said that we could crash at their dorm so it was all good. After the bar closed, we headed back to the girls place and kept drinking. One of the girls busted out some pot and we got faded. I guess I passed out some time after that and <a href=http://www.theuncensored.com/clickin.php?siteid=24 target=_blank><font color=red>then woke up randomly cussing people</font></a>.<br><a href=http://www.ebaumsworld.com/cgi-bin/top50/rankem.cgi?id=college target=_blank><img
src=http://collegedrunkfest.com/images/ozarks/mycar%20030.jpg height=256 width=340 alt=           I woke up the next morning to a refrigerator door to the back of the head. I guess I had dragged my ass inside to pass out. I got up and headed back to Ryan’s dorm. I called Brian and told him to pick me up, and then called Ryan to see where he was. He was walking back from the girls place too. We waited for Brian and then decided to go to the pool again. It was about 10 and we all passed out by the pool to try to sleep off the hang over. Simon and James finally got a hold of us and they came to the pool as well. Ryan asked James if he had slept in the fat girl’s bed with her and the answer was, “Fuck Yeah I Did! ” We all went to Culver’s to get some food, but I was still too fucked up to eat. Brian had decided that he needed to get a hotel room so after we ate him and Simon went there and James, Ryan, and I went back to the pool. We basically just passed out by the pool all day and around 4 we headed to the hotel to see what Brian and Simon were doing. Once we got there, we decided to make Hand Grenades. Once it was mixed and we ordered some FUCKIN PIZZA, we headed down to the hot tub to start getting wasted. The Hand Grenades mixed great with the hot water and we were back to fucked up in no time. Adam and Matt came over to chill and then we saw some drunk ass lady get arrested across the street. We went back to the room to get read to go out and keep drinking. We finally headed back out to Sharky’s to meet up with Ryan. After 5 Grenades I was basically tanked again. I grabbed a pitcher at the bar to pound myself and just kept getting more and more fucked. People were doing karaoke again and we were all just chillin. Brian and James fuck with all the condiments on the table that we were sitting at. Sugar in the salt shaker, cigarette butt in the A1 and Tabasco in the catsup. After 2 more pitchers, I found myself about to sing Mr. Brownstone. I pounded back my pitcher only to find that Simon had filled it with pepper. As the music started, I was so pissed that I had no more beer, I just started calling for a beer instead of singing. I finally just dropped the mic and walked away. The bar closed soon after that and we walked back to the hotel. On the way we walked past a pool and I grabbed a lounge chair and tossed it into the pool. For some reason I took off running and tumbled down a hill. James helped me up and we finally got back to the hotel and I started kicking the door because I thought it was locked. The lady at the desk came and opened the door that wasn’t locked at all so I told her to fuck off and went to the room to pass the fuck out.


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