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Dairy Queen

Written by Kid Bacardi

          So I get these orders to go up to MN to fill out paper work to make sure that all of my military files were in order. So I head up to Rockford and give Joe a call. He was at work so I met up with Trever and we went to go drink at the restrant Joe works at. We have a few drinks there and then head out to Adada's house to keep boozing. Like usual, there isn't shit to do in Rockford so we decided to get drunk and buy some lift tickets. A bunch of Highschool kids show up and I know that the night is chalked up as a loss. After about $200 of fun I crash at about 7:30.
          We don't end up leaving for MN till Sunday and we get up there around 7:30. By 8:30 we were at Hooters with a few pitchers in front of us. It was one of my boys 30th birthday the next day so we rushed things along an got the Hooters bitches to do the whole birthday thing. The show was kinda weak I think that they had the B squad working on Sunday night, so after a few more pitchers we headed back to the hotel. When we got back there was a bunch of noise coming from the bar. We all headed in to find a bunch of older ladies getting fucked up. Turns out they were all there for a Dairy Queen Convention. They all started getting touchy feely and this 70 year old lady started rubbing my boys chest and told him that if she was a few years younger she would take him back to her room and fuck the shit out of him. That was about all that we could handle so we rolled out.
          The next day we did paper work all day and didn't get back to the hotel till 8:00. We all got ready to go out and head back to Hooters. We had 4 pitchers there and the manager took two of them off our tab because we were all military. We then head to some sports bar and started getting ripped. By the time the football game was over we were all wasted. They started playing music and were decided that dancing was the way to go. There was only one problem, there were no good looking bitches. I guess since it's so cold up there all the bitches put on a few extra pounds to keep them warm. Oh well, after that minor road block was over come we decided that we would never see these fat chicks again and went hoggin. As the night rolled on we decided that enough was enough and retired back to the hotel. If I were you I would strongly recomend not hanging out in the bars at the Mall of America.

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